Do you let people run into a trap?

How do you decide who to warn?

When is it your responsibility?

For what reasons should you warn?

We will often see people headed into a trap.

Often, we have no connection to it.

Outside observers often see these traps easily.

How do you know you should get involved?

Making this decision can be painful.

Imagine yourself in their shoes and decide.

What is more important:

A person's behavior?

A person's values?

A person's character?

What shows you more, who you can trust?

Only because someone is nice to you,

it does not mean he intends well.

Just because someone is rude to you,

it does not mean they aren't trustworthy.

Behavior, character, and values do not need to align.

They rarely align.

The main ingredients to gage a person are time, time, and time.

What do you dislike?

What do you struggle with?

What have you tried to improve?

What has not gone so well?

You can put lipstick on a pig.

However, it will still be a pig.

Things you dislike and struggle with,

won't magically be better.

Not even if you shift your mindset,

not even if you pretend something,

not even if you get help.

They will still suck, accept it.

How easily do you make friends?

How many childhood friends do you have?

How many adult friends do you have?

What is important to make a friend?

Most of our friends are from childhood.

Adult friendships are a different ball game.

There are three main ingredients:

Vicinity: how much time can you spend together?

Timing: are you at the same place in life?

Energy: what energy do you have together?

What is your social preference?

What is your optimal group size?

What is your preferred event type?

How well do you need to know people?

Not everyone likes the same group size,

nor the same types of events.

Forcing yourself to social events is often pointless.

Find your optimal mode to socialize.

And double down on it.

Life is too short.

What is your comfort zone?

How much time do you spend in it?

Are you happy in your comfort zone?

Are you sure you know your comfort?

To grow, we should leave our comfort zone.

Yet, within our comfort zone, we are at peace.

To grow, we need to rest, to rest we need peace.

Most of us don't know what true comfort is.

There are two paths:

change yourself or change your environment.

Both are not always an option.

When is it time to take down the flag?

How long is it worth flying for?

When was the flag hoisted?

Why was the flag hoisted?

We tend to uphold things too long.

We struggle to let go.

Nostalgia is like our shackles.

A good time past is a good time past.

What has overrun its time?

Which chapters are better closed?

How clearly do you perceive?

What judgments do you arrive at?

How well can you take perspectives?

How opinionated are you?

Facts vs opinions,

objective vs subjective,

right vs wrong,

Black and white thinking is simplistic.

And the world is complex.

This does not fit together.

Greyish thinking may be the way.

However, the world is a colorful place.

How useful do you feel?

Do you like to feel useful?

Of use to whom?

How much use is enough?

We all want to feel useful.

Useful to our family.

Useful to our community.

Useful to ourselves.

Useful to our grand goals.

And so do others. Always.

Never take this away from them.

How patient are you?

How do you know when it is enough?

Why do you continue to wait?

When are you being passive?

Patience and passivity are not the same.

Patience is giving something time to develop.

Passivity is inaction with no end in sight.

When you know it is time to act,

yet you do not do so,

you have entered passive territory.

Do not become a permanent resident.

How well do you remember?

And what do you remember?

Do your memories seem extreme?

Do your memories seem patchy?

Our memories are immaterial,

they are foggy, semi-material at best.

Emotions influence what we remember.

So we remember specific moments,

moments of joy, of pain, of laughter, of sadness etc.

Ask yourself, what goes in the white space.

How is your life defined?

Externally or internally?

Do outside forces affect your trajectory?

Or do inside forces affect your trajectory?

How do you get motivated?

Often, external forces decide what we do,

how we feel and how we behave.

Yet, our inner self should be in charge.

Intrinsic forces should be guiding us.

External forces can alter the path,

Internal forces should define the goal.

Who might be manipulating you right now?

How successful are they with it?

Who else plays this game with you?

What is their goal, do you know?

Anyone around you might try this.

Your colleagues and your friends,

Your family and your business partners,

Your government and your superiors.

Know how to spot it, and don't join the game.

Remember the last time you pressured someone?

How did that go for you?

How did it go in the short-term?

How did it go in the long-term?

Would you do it again?

We get pressured into all sorts of things.

And just as well, we pressure others.

The result tends to be suboptimal.

In the short-term it often seems great.

In the long-term it rarely is.

What do you not enjoy to do?

When was the last time you tried?

Who did you try it with?

Why not give it another shot?

Not fun is not forever.

The magic can depend on the people,

on the moment,

on the place,

on your age, etc.

Do not write something off forever.

What is your load limit?

How does your load limit change?

How good are you at loading yourself?

Does it differ for different areas?

Plans, tasks, responsibilities, belongings, people etc.

We tend to overestimate the load we can carry.

We load up till our axles break.

Incremental load increases are the road to take.

How do you feel at year's end?

How do you feel at the year's start?

How do they differ, if at all?

How much pressure do you feel?

The start of a new year can be stressful.

We can put ourselves under pressure.

Pressure to do and be better.

Rome was not built in a day,

and nor do you change in a day.

What do you focus more on?

Processes or goals?

Why do you prefer one over the other?

Or does one need the other?

If we do not know where we go,

we cannot pick the right path.

Yet if we do not pick the right path,

we shall never arrive at our destination.

How well can you concentrate?

When do you struggle more, when less?

Why do you struggle more or less?

What helps you concentrate?

Concentration is important.

But, not always easy to do.

Do what helps you, no matter what.

Walk, read out loud, stand, music, noise etc.

Who cares at the end, how you made it?

How much does a task cost you?

Can you afford to do the task yourself?

Can you afford not to do the task yourself?

How can you gauge real costs vs opportunity costs?

We are faced with this dilemma often, daily even.

Sometimes the real costs outweigh opportunity costs.

Sometimes we need to do something ourselves.

For lack of funds, lack of time, or lack of whatever.

Sometimes we can outsource for better use of ourselves.